Refraining from Complaining
During a previous Halloween season, I wrote about the “no complaining for 24 hours challenge” and received so much positive feedback that I thought I would invite us all to try it again this year. With all that is happening right now, this challenge is more timely and, perhaps, more difficult.
Before you read any further, please stop and note what time it is. Remember the time because for the next 24 hours, I invite you to join me in taking the challenge to abide by the advice offered in the quote box above: go 24 hours without complaining, not even once. Can you do it? Can I do it? Of course, we can. Will we, though? We’ll soon find out.
Negativity is easy and rampant, especially in these anxious times. The half-empty view of life is all around us. Like a virus, it's highly contagious. Being cynical is often defended as merely being realistic. Pick a topic -- whether it be politics, work, family life, school, health care, you name it, and it's easy to find naysayers espousing their negativity about what's wrong.
While Halloween celebrations will be scaled back this year, many children will still visit at least a few houses in their neighborhood to ask the familiar question of "trick or treat?” Treats will be given in a creative, socially distanced manner, and thus the tricks will be avoided.
In a sense, the question, "trick or treat?" is a great question, not just for Halloween, but as a question that asks us each to reflect on how we see ourselves, our lives, and the world around us.
Seeing life as primarily a trick gives rise to negativity, which naturally gives rise to expressions of complaint. Seeing life alternatively as primarily a treat gives rise to a positive attitude and expressions of gratitude. Life is, of course, a mixture of tricks and treats. Bad things happen to good people, and life is indeed not fair sometimes. There are indeed tricksters in the world who need to be confronted and held accountable. What I am talking about here, though, is our pervasive attitude about one's life, work, family, friends, and even life itself. Do you and I see life primarily as a trick or a treat? What do our comments and complaints tell others about how we see the world?
If you tend to be a negative, complaining person, I invite you, in the spirit of Halloween, to dress up as a positive, grateful, and “half-full” person for at least the next 24 hours. Please know that I will be doing this challenge right along with you as I have noticed myself uttering more expressions of half-emptiness than half-fullness lately.
Of course, if you have been a negative person for some time, people around you will recognize that you are dressing up as someone who's not really you, but that will be okay. Over time, you and others around you may like the new, less frightening look you will be sporting, and it might start to grow on you. Eventually, it might not end up being a costume after all!
Okay, unless you have uttered some negative words while reading this column, you have 23 hours 57 minutes left in your challenge for zero tolerance when it comes to complaining. If you slip up, the clock starts over again until you have accomplished a complaint-free 24 hours.
Have fun with this little trick, and invite others to try it as well. And know that as you do this, you will be providing a treat not just for yourself, but for the people with whom you interact.
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