Assist Leaders
March Madness is upon us, and if you are a college basketball fan, there is nothing better than the NCAA basketball tournaments. Both the women’s and men’s games start this weekend, and although they will be run very differently because of the pandemic, fans are thrilled that they are happening again after being canceled last year.
Basketball, like most sports, has an abundance of statistics associated with the game. These include field goal, free throw, and three-point shot percentages, as well as statistics on blocked shots, steals, points in the paint, turnovers, bench points, rebounds, and free throws, among others.
One of my favorite statistics is for the number of assists each player makes. In case you are not a fan of the game, a player receives credit for an assist when they make a pass that directly contributes to a successful shot by another player. Players that consistently have a high number of assists in a game are unselfish because rather than always looking for a shot for themselves, they pass the ball to a teammate so that he or she can score.
This is a column about personal growth and wellness, though, and not basketball, but I’m sure you see where I’m going with this. The connection here is that one clear sign of emotional and relational wellness is the willingness to assist others, rather than needing to keep the focus on one's self. The players that score the most in basketball often get the most attention, while the players who make the most assists often go unnoticed and unrecognized.
This is not just true in basketball; it's true in life as well, as we have discovered just how vital essential workers are to our lives. I am thinking of teachers, people who work at grocery stores, hospital workers of all kinds, and people who serve as caretakers for friends or family members. I think of clergy, social workers, and others who put in long days, often for little pay, to care for those in need. And also the community organizer who works to create fair housing for everyone, those who work for racial justice, and those who staff domestic violence hotlines. These are just a few examples of the assist leaders amongst us. These people, unfortunately, often go unnoticed and unrecognized.
I spent many years coaching youth soccer, a sport that also keeps track of assists. After every game, the other coaches and I made it a practice to single out and celebrate the players that had made assists that day. Those who had scored the goals had already received more than enough recognition. In soccer, when a player scores, the entire team typically runs to surround and congratulate the player. There is rarely similar recognition for the player who made the assist that helped their teammate score.
The lesson for me in all of this is twofold. First, I need always to be looking around to see to whom I can pass the ball. In this case, the “ball” may be a compliment, an expression of gratitude, or keeping quiet so someone else’s voice can be heard. Second, I need to make a special effort to appreciate and acknowledge others when I see them making an assist--whether that assist directly benefits me or someone else. Most of us probably know an assist leader who could use a little encouragement and appreciation right now.
If you are a college basketball fan, enjoy the games over the next few weeks. Root hard for your favorite team. Root hard for the underdogs along with the teams you picked to go far in your brackets. And root hard for the assist leaders, too, because in the end, none of us can win without them.
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