Weekly Words of Wellness Archive
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• Living in Relationships
• Gaining Healthy Perspectives
• Practicing Self Care
• Building Values
• Spirituality
Living in Relationships
"When We Can't Untangle Ourselves"
"Springing Back to Life"
"In The Same Boat"
"Restoring Power"
"Don't Try This At Home!"
The Community of a Peloton
"Dadisms: Happy Father's Day!"
"Celebrating With Our Graduates:"
"You Can't Hurry Love"
"Making A Great Entrance"
"The Best Valentine's Gift of All"
"The Healing Power of Community"
"Let's Root, Root, Root for the Home Team"
"The Available Parent"
"Who Do You Appreciate?"
"The Love Of A Father"
"Miracle Workers"
"Standing In Love"
"Sitting Together, On Purpose"
Christmas Love
"Of Masks and Halloween"
"Coaching Opportunities"
"Muscular Love"
Pay Attention To What You Pay Attention To
"Learning to Shift"
"Flood Recovery"
"Fireworks and Relationships"
"Emotional Triangles"
"The Grass is Always Greener....."
Commencement Exercises
Response Ability
"Big Shoes To Fill"
"Emotional Cutoffs"
"The Ground Begins to Soften"
"How Silently, How Silently, the Wondrous Gift is Given"
"Deploying Our Energy"
A Reminder to Pay Attention to What We Pay Attention to
Life itself is the proper binge
Relationship Math
Standing in the Need of Prayer
All In Good Time
Happy Mothering Day!
You, Too, Can Be a Superhero
Moving Well Without the Ball
I DARE YOU!
The Rest of the Story
A New Kind of Stimulus Package
You Are In Love
Pilots and Passengers
Don’t Be a Frog When Dealing with Stress
The Roots of Change
A Higher Degree of Resolution
TRICK or TREAT Just for Halloween
Pay Attention to What You Pay Attention To
May 31, 2009
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All In Good Time
The Rev. Dr. Scott Stoner
A story is told about a little girl that was growing impatient waiting for the rose bush in the back yard to bloom. One day, when the rose buds were still several days from opening, she could wait no longer. She went to the bush and began pulling on the pedals trying to get them to open. Soon she had pulled the pedals off all of the flowers. She began to cry and her mother game out to see what was wrong. The child explained that she was sorry for destroying the flowers, but that she was only trying to help them bloom faster.
I felt a bit like this child in regards to a tree in our yard this year. It is an ash tree and it is quite beautiful, but it is always the last tree in our yard to bud. Every year I worry that the tree is sick and that something must be wrong. Then, finally, just this past week the buds on the ash tree began to appear and are now everywhere. The tree looks quite healthy after all, and soon its leaves will be in full blossom.
How is your patience when waiting for something to blossom? When I ask this question, I am not only referring to plants or trees. At any given time in our lives we may find ourselves waiting for something or someone to blossom. A new relationship may not be moving fast enough for us. The promotion we thought we would have had by now may not have happened. We may be concerned that our child is not maturing as fast as his or her peers. Our marriage may feel dormant and we are anxious for romance to bloom again. We may be recovering from a significant loss, and feel frustrated that new life is not returning fast enough.
In our impatience for something or someone to blossom, we may make the mistake that the little girl did regarding the rose bush: we may start picking at our child, or friend, or spouse, or colleague, trying to make something happen sooner than is possible. This will create just the opposite reaction. Rather than moving growth along more quickly, our impatience often delays the growth or change we seek, or might even destroy it altogether.
Watching and waiting for a plant or tree to blossom is a good reminder for us that we do not control the world around us. The forces of life, love and growth are a mystery. We are not the creators of these forces, but we are called to be the stewards of them. Each plant, each tree blossoms when it is ready, and so it is with ourselves, others and the important relationships in our lives. Our role is to provide proper conditions for life and love to grow, and then to patiently wait for that to happen.
There is much to be learned about life and love as we watch the earth blossom all around us this time of year. The late blooming tree in my yard taught me an important lesson about patience: that life unfolds at its own pace. I invite you to take a few moments this week to reflect on a lesson or two that the natural world might have to teach you. Nature is always a good teacher when we have the patience to be good students.
